Inkabout L. Darby Gibbs

Science Fiction & Fantasy author

Health

7+ Healthy Writer Activities That Help You Be a Better Writer

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Health in all its dimensions.

I am a firm believer that being healthy leads to all sorts of benefits. As a writer, I especially want to do the things that add quality to my writing.  The more healthy I am, the better I think, write, plan, organize, and step into another person’s (replace with character’s) shoes.

  1. Sleep. We absolutely must sleep enough. For some writers, seven hours is optimum while others have different required amounts of sleep. So it is not that a writer must sleep a particular number of hours, but a writer must sleep the right number of hours.
  2. Drink enough clean, pure water. The brain needs water and it needs a specific amount. Just as writers need different amounts of sleep, their need for water differs too. It is dependent upon the climate lived in, the weight of the individual, how much exercise is practiced, whether or the writer takes medicine which effects water usage and even if the writer drinks other liquids which steal water. So it isn’t a particular amount, it is the correct amount that the body needs.
  3. Companionship which supplies trust, support, a kind shoulder, challenge, and encouragement. This helps keep stress down because there is someone who will be there during the rough times.
  4. Speaking of stress: this is one of the top destructive health issues. Read, listen to music, meditate, go for a bike ride, knit, play Sims: reduce stress by doing those things that make you relax and get away from the stress inducing actions/experiences.
  5. Eat food that supports the mind and body. Sounds simple, but it isn’t.  So this means no fast food, no sodas, no high salt chips, etc. It means eating for the body (and for the mind).
  6. Exercise at least thirty minutes a day (three to five  times a week) in a fashion that raises your heart rate, warms up your muscles, and challenges your lungs and your strength.
  7. This is the plus one: and it’s not a repeat of number 3. Hang out with people who look at things positively, are honest with you and want you to be honest with them, are fair minded and open to new ideas, and have few prejudices (I’m okay with people who aren’t crazy about spiders and snakes). If they are knowledgeable about things you aren’t, then you have bonus material in that friendship.
  8. For writers only:  write.

True — I have offered nothing new. But new isn’t needed. Do what are bodies and minds have always needed. It doesn’t matter that there is more technology. We still need sleep that rejuvenates, food that nourishes, love that makes us secure, friendship that brings us positive viewpoints, reasons to smile, support to get us through the tough times, and strong bodies fit to recover from illness, carry us through stress and open the pickle jar.

If you liked this post, please share it.

#health
#write

Harness your emotional grip on creativity with levels of intensity

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I love reading about the creative process. So many things effect the act of creation. There is place, time, deadlines, atmosphere, and a sense of purpose. But a recent article covered the idea that emotion has an effect on results and even on what area of creation the artist should focus on based on that emotion.

According to Scott Barry Kaufman in his article “The Emotions That Make Us More Creative,” one should consider not just emotions that are “positive and negative,” but also “emotional intensity.”

Kaufman argues that research shows that the belief that positive emotion increases creativity because it broadens the outlook and negative emotion narrows the focus thus reducing the creativity is “simplistic.”

Kaufman went on to explain that intensity was also very important. Emotions that are positive but lack intensity do not necessarily improve creativity. Applying research done by a psychologist named Eddie Harmon-Jones and his associates, Kaufman explained that the emotion “pleasant” as too mild while “desire” has intensity and therefore greater motivational power which would lead to completing a goal.

This is all very interesting, but how does one direct it toward creative writing? Kaufman clarifies this by stating that “high emotional states focus us on completing a goal” whereas “low emotional states” drive us to “seek” greater challenge elsewhere.  In a sense that lower emotional state causes us to seek creativity.

So to answer that question: how does this effect our creativity as writers? When we writers are feeling less intense, we are more likely to be inspired to come up with something new and unique. When we are feeling highly energized, it is likely we will do well to focus on a goal or action that requires completion.

When feeling good, relaxed or slightly under the weather, direct yourself to the act of drafting. Creativity will be within reach and supported by our emotional state which won’t distract us with emotional intensity.

But when feeling highly emotional (positive or negative) our attention narrows, so we should be working on the final phases of a work, such as editing, formatting or organizing.

I am still thinking this through. When I am being creative in my writing, I get very intense and focused on the work I am drafting. That seems to run counter to what Kaufman is saying. But I must agree that at the start of the act of creating I am often in the medium range of emotion.

Later when I am choosing to edit, I find that being tightly focused, a high intensity desire to work on something, does get me to redraft and define my intention on a scene better than being relaxed does.

What I liked best about the article though is that he stated that creative people are able to adapt and mix emotional states for the best results. We are essentially diverse and not boxed in by our emotions. We harness them. Yeah, emotionally creative powerhouses. I’ll take that complement.

Have any of you noted your emotional state and its effect on your creativity?  What have you found about the connection between emotion and your work?

#emotion
#creativity
#writing

8 Ways to Strengthen Your Writer Posture

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Every writer needs a strong posture.

I recently watched a TED talks video, Amy Cuddy’s “Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are.” As a teacher, I understand the dynamics of body language. I read my students’ body language all the time and modify my approach to match or alter their attitudes so the class runs smoothly and achieves my intended goals for learning.

Watching this video brought to mind that this approach to body language relates to writers and how we do what we do.

The obvious connection is how our characters respond to given situations. The postures we describe our characters holding tells a lot to our readers about how the character is feeling about the situation. Do they expect to win or lose? Are they going to fight or run? Do they like the people they are with? Which ones more than others? How is the day going so far?

When that described posture is combined with narrative evaluation or internal dialogue, we end up with contrast, support, and definition.

Every writer makes use of body language.

But what about the writer as writer? How does a writer adjust his/her posture for power and confidence, raise testosterone and lower cortisol in the other aspects of being a writer?

I have read numerous descriptions of writers as shy, quiet, non-social, and insecure people. We present big, but in actuality lack confidence in being writers. I don’t know if that is true since fifty years back the typical writer was often viewed as a heavy drinking, loud, drug taking, know it all. Were they faking it?  Were they, to paraphrase Cuddy, faking it until they became it? Everybody is “coming out,” so perhaps authors are too, and maybe we really are totally insecure. I know I am a shy person who has a teaching persona my students often describe as demanding. Being a demanding person would not work for me as a writer. And I am not interested in following the drinking, loud, drug taking, know-it-all approach to ensure my “writing persona” is strong. So how can we use Cuddy’s ideas to present a strong writer posture in our writing endeavors?

Here are 8 ways to use Cuddy’s ideas to strengthen our writing posture.

  1. Before you start writing, take that power pose — hands on your hips, feet shoulder-width apart and chin just a bit above parallel with the ground (called the Wonder Woman for a reason.) You should hear the theme: “Wonder Writer, Wonder Writer” playing in the background. Do this before you sit down to write that post, chapter, poem, etc. 
  2. Unless, of course, you are trying to write a downcast character and you are one of those writers that act out your characters as you write — so a low confidence pose would be good to start with: shoulders curled in, arms down and held close to the body clutching the torso or neck protectively — gather a sense of what that feels like and then power up and sit down.
  3. Going for an interview: written, audio, video, in person — first stand up, raise your hands in the air and shout (or whisper very loud) “I’m being interviewed” like it is an Emmy award you’re receiving. Now go show them your stuff.
  4. How about that important phone call: Power pose it. By the way, according to Cuddy you have to hold this pose for two minutes. Now pick up the phone and make the call.
  5. About to upload your formatted eBook:  Walk around larger than life, take a stand in the middle of the room, power pose. Now go upload that baby. It’s ready to face the world.
  6. Putting together a proposal to an agent? Feeling daunted by the task? Time to power pose. You got this. Now write that proposal.
  7. About to edit your fully drafted novel? Definitely time for a power pose. This is the second most common time for low confidence in the writer. (For me, number 4 is the number one low confidence time.) You’ve put in all this work and now you’re saying it is done and ready for clean up. 
  8. Did somebody just say, “I hear that you write”? Get big, take up space — chest out, arms a little away from the body, chin up a bit or go for the power pose. Remember that’s hands on hips, feet apart, chin up. “Damn straight, I’m a writer.” Yeah, that’s asking a bit much for me, too. But it would give me a rush of confidence, enough to say. “Yes, yes, I am.”

It’s been nice having this little chat. Consider following me, tweeting this post, checking by again. I do occasionally …. can you give me a couple minutes….  Okay, I’m ready now. So you enjoyed this post. Follow me, Tweet my post, come by each week and you’ll find something valuable in my  writings to take away with you. I challenge you to check out my earlier posts. Yeah, power posture.

#powerposture
#writing
#confidence

Losing my mother one precious memory at a time.

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Casting light on the darker moments.

The past year has been one of a calculated effort to connect with my mother as she slips into dementia.  Two years ago she was a vibrant business woman, respected and successful.  I left a message on her phone each Wednesday night, my “Wednesday Love Call,” and then I would call on the only day she wasn’t at work, Sunday, and we would chat about our varied experiences that week.

When I was a teenager coming home after a really bad day of teenhood, I would sit down with my mother and spill out my troubles, but they always made us laugh.

  •  “Mom, I dropped a book from my locker today, and it landed on the head of the cutest boy in school. His locker is below mine, which is ridiculous.  I’m 5’2″ and he’s 6’2″.”
  • “Mom, the college prep class I’m taking is weird.  Even the teacher looked at me like I must be lost to be in her class.  It’s been more than a week, and I feel I am trying to break in on a clique of beach girls. I want to be at the beach, but I am not crazy about the company.”  
  • “Mom, that teacher asked me if I had read The Source by Michener.  I want to write my analysis essay on it, and she doesn’t even believe I have read the book I have chosen.”

As an adult, these phone calls always served to make life something I could laugh at.  Together we made the perfect funny bone.

  • Mom, I just spent the morning cleaning up dog vomit which my husband made sure to point out to me just before I stepped in it.  He gets up at least an hour before I do. It was very cold through the paper towels.  Do you know he was very annoyed about the affect of stomach acid on linoleum?
  • Mom, my students were particularly energetic yesterday.  I made them get out of their seats and do jumping jacks, and then we started on the lesson.  Today they wanted to know if we would be exercising again.  Shucks, we do exercises every day: grammar.
  • Mom, your granddaughter asked me if I would still love her when she is a big girl using the potty instead of pullups.  The doctor was right: she definitely was potty trained before four years old.  All it took was telling her I would love her every time she grew bigger.  Instant potty trained child.  Really this is prime information every parent needs and no one shared.

These days she gets caught in loops, repeating herself.  I tell her about the weather over and over like she hasn’t already asked me three times.  I call prepared to tell her a story that will make her laugh, because she knows there is something very wrong with her memory and that unspoken knowledge ensnares her in fits of weeping if I don’t keep her focused on something humorous.

  • Mom, she’s a junior now and wants to be an engineer.  Oh, she’s wanted to do that since she was about twelve.  Her birthday is in June.  But I’ve been telling her she is not allowed to grow any more since she was about seven, and I think this time she is listening to me.
  • No, Mom, even if you moved half way here it would still be a long way to walk.  About four hundred miles, which would leave your feet a bit sore.  And then there’s that long walk back.
  • Well, Mom, occasionally the grading does get me down, but when it’s 11:50 PM and I read an essay in which the student has written, “Marlowe was really confused when he found the book written in cypher, and he thought there was a spy trying to steal the ivory, but it was really a skinny Russian guy wearing patched clothes.  What was Conrad thinking when he wrote that?” Of course, then I have to explain the book to her, and by the time I am done, we’ve had quite a chuckle.

This woman I call my mother is my father’s last wife, so she didn’t give birth to me.  But she and I have always had a favorite “you say, I say” — “I almost remember giving birth to you.”  “Mom, I almost remember it, too.”

This could be me thirty years from now, and if I don’t write these books now, they will never be written.  Whatever the dream, don’t let it die with you.  Don’t let it become lost one day in the thunderous shift of a mind. 

Married for 30 years: How did that happen?

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Keep as much as you can in common

When I look back at all my husband and I have done in our lives together, it is not so hard to understand how we could be married for more than 30 years.  Rather than go into the specifics of all those adventures, I  am going to supply a list of general rules that we follow that I feel are the reasons we are together and are planning on staying that way.

  • We recognize that we have many dissimilar interests, so while we respect those differences we encourage those interests we have in common.  We both love to waterski.
  • When we have disagreements, we work on the premise that everything we say should be geared towards working it out. 
  • I cannot read his mind nor he mine, but we have had plenty of time to learn to read the body language we use.  Given that, we make every effort to keep the lines of communication open.  Sometimes that means taking some time to figure out what it is we want the other person to know, whether he/she “should have figured” it out or not.
  • We don’t say anything negative about each other to other people.  We don’t argue in public.  We do say positive things about each other to other people.
  • When it comes to spending a large sum of money on something, we both have to agree.
  • We have a designated bill payer, designated lawn care person, designated kitchen cleaner, etc., but the other person is welcome to help anytime and does. 
  • One of us is always better at something than the other, so we always help each other.
  • We don’t make the other person feel uncomfortable.
  • We happen to have the same occupation, but we go about our jobs differently.  So we know there is more than one way to do something and still do it right.  That means we can learn from each other, even when we are already experts.
  • We don’t love each other despite or in spite of our flaws.  We love each other because of all we are: flaws and finer qualities together.
  • There are some things neither of us like to do, but they have to be done.  So we make sure we do them together.
  • Most importantly: We like each other.

We do mess up on occasion, but we always come back to one thing:  underneath the problem is the promise that we love each other.

Photos, memories, mothers and time – never enough

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Over the last few months, I have been noticing my step mother has been suffering from short-term memory loss.  She will, in fact, ask me the same questions several times over the course of a ten minute phone call.  She writes lists of things she has to get done and then forgets where the list is or even that she already wrote it.  She does not remember if she paid her taxes this year.  This loving woman has been my mother since I was a little girl, so my attachment to her is strong and deep. 

Just months ago we were talking about books, her customers, being a mother, and what activities she has planned.  These days she cries during most of my calls, she is frightened of driving at night, tells me repeatedly that she loves me and is fearful I will take offense at something she says or does and stop loving her.

I call her multiple times a week since we live several states apart, and I can seldom visit her. 

She asked me quite recently to create a photo album of my daughter since her birth to the present.  At first I thought of this as a task that would be quite time consuming especially since I have sent her pictures over the years, and she could build such an album herself.  But in the last few months, she has admitted to having problems remembering things.  I am beginning to think that what she was asking for was something to keep her from forgetting her granddaughter. 

So now I am busy building that life album for her.  I hope it is enough to help her hold onto a granddaughter she loves.  The journey ahead looks particularly uncertain, my time with her off kilter and short.